Where am I?

The wife and I had a great day on thursday, I felt really connected, we had fun, we felt like a married couple. Yesterday wasn't bad either. Saturday was mostly suck because I worked all tay. Today however was very distant. We cuddled on the sofa and watch torchwood. Pretty much all three episodes were crap. Is this the last disk of the season? I don't know.

What I really don't know is where am I. She felt very distant to me. I don't want to overreact and think this means we're beginning to separate but ever time I've felt that way in the past it's ended up that way.

Now I'm a bit more of a grown up and both my wife and i have the same ideal. If you hit a rough spot in your marriage work it out. But I'm not sure how. I'm not sure what's wrong. Why does she feel distant? Am I doing something wrong? Did I knot do enough housework today? Maybe I should have bathed the kids. Am I pressuring her too much for sex? I did sort of fall asleep on the floor today. I cleaned yesterday and today because the maids come tomorrow I know not cleaning bugs her. Is this just a carry over rom the previous. Thing is I got some mixed signals. I leaned over and started kissing her neck and she started to respond. then I moved lower and she pushed me away. ? Did she like it or not? Not wanting to pressure her I stopped. THen later she ended up sitting on my lap straddling me. She ground herself into me a sec and said it'd been a long time since she'd ridden me. Then she suddenly got up and walked away as soon as I started to feel randy.
I totally don't get it. What am I doing wrong/not doing?

maybe I'm just expecting this to heal too quickly. I probably am but she's the love of my life. She's my best friend. Without her I have nothing. Really, nothing. There's no point to my life without her so when I feel like I'm loosing even the tiniest bit of her it terrifies her.

Maybe that's part of the problem, perhaps I'm smothering.

Read something great once. "Love is two separate people living together." The idea is that if you try and become one another it doesn't work out. Maybe I'm trying to hard.

fuck.